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The Broom, the Shovel,
the Poker and the Tongs


 
I

The Broom and the Shovel, the Poker and the Tongs,
    They all took a drive in the Park,
And they each sang a song, Ding-a-dong, Ding-a-dong,
    Before they went back in the dark.
Mr. Poker he sate quite upright in the coach,
    Mr. Tongs made a clatter and clash,
Miss Shovel was all dressed in black (with a brooch),
    Mrs. Broom was in blue (with a sash).
        Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong!
        And they all sang a song!

 

II

'O Shovel so lovely!' the Poker he sang,
    'You have perfectly conquered my heart!
'Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong! If you're pleased with my song,
    'I will feed you with cold apple tart!
'When you scrape up the coals with a delicate sound,
    'You encapture my life with delight!
'Your nose is so shiny! your head is so round!
    'And your shape is so slender and bright!
        'Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong!
        'Ain't you pleased with my song?'

 

III

'Alas! Mrs. Broom!' sighed the Tongs in his song,
    'O is it because I'm so thin,
'And my legs are so long -- Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong!
    'That you don't care about me a pin?
'Ah! fairest of creatures, when sweeping the room,
    'Ah! why don't you heed my complaint!
'Must you needs be so cruel, you beautiful Broom,
    'Because you are covered with paint?
        'Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong!
        'You are certainly wrong!'

 

IV

Mrs. Broom and Miss Shovel together they sang,
    'What nonsense you're singing to-day!'
Said the Shovel, 'I'll certainly hit you a bang!'
    Said the Broom, 'And I'll sweep you away!'
So the Coachman drove homeward as fast as he could,
    Perceiving their anger with pain;
But they put on the kettle and little by little,
    They all became happy again.
        Ding-a-dong! Ding-a-dong!
        There's an end of my song!


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