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There was an old person of Deal,
Who in walking, used only his heel;
When they said, 'Tell us why?' --
He made no reply;
That mysterious old person of Deal.
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There was an old man of Thermopylæ,
Who never did anything propersly;
But they said, 'If you choose,
To boil eggs in your shoes,
You shall never remain in Thermopylæ.
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There was an old person of Minety
Who purchased five hundred and ninety
Large apples and pears,
Which he threw unawares,
At the heads of the people of Minety.
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There was an old man whose despair
Induced him to purchase a hare:
Whereon one fine day,
He rode wholly away,
Which partly assuaged his despair.
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There was an old person of Pinner,
As thin as a lath, if not thinner;
They dressed him in white,
And roll'd him up tight,
That elastic old person of Pinner.
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There was an old person of Bromley,
Whose ways were not cheerful or comely;
He sate in the dust,
Eating spiders and crust,
That unpleasing old person of Bromley.
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There was an old man of Dunrose;
A parrot seized hold of his nose.
When he grew melancholy,
They said, 'His name's Polly,'
Which soothed that old man of Dunrose.
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There was an old man on the Border,
Who lived in the utmost disorder;
He danced with the cat,
And made tea in his hat,
Which vexed all the folks on the Border.
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There was an old man of Spithead,
Who opened the window, and said, -
'Fil-jomble, fil-jumble,
Fil-rumble-come-tumble!'
That doubtful old man of Spithead.
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There was an old person of Sheen,
Whose expression was calm and serene;
He ate in the water,
And drank bottled porter,
That placid old person of Sheen.
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